Song Sung Blue

Your grass is turning black
There's no water in your well
Your spent your last lone dollar
On seven shotgun shells
--The Ballad of Hollis Brown,
Bob Dylan

And why should I call your name,
when you're to blame
for making me Blue?
--Wasted Days and Wasted Nights,
Freddie Fender

I don't think ... anywhere in history
has someone killed someone else
and something better has come out of it.
It's just ... not possible
--soldier, Gunner Palace (2004)
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If the Phony War on Terror (PWOT ©) were a song, it would definitely be a country wailer about who got the gold mine and who got the shaft.

Depending on who was singing, there would probably be the idea of "take this job and shove it", too. We know it would end badly with a plaintive refrain. Even old dogs and watermelon wine couldn't make it feel better.

Since day one the war has inspired Country Western songs; after the events of 9-11-01 we were deluged with false patriotism and "bring it on" jingoism. Ranger wonders why Toby Keith hasn't written any new ass-kicking tunes reflecting the new realities of the PWOT.

Here are some possible titles:

• The Zippo and the Koran
• Golden Showers for You
• Lock Your Children Up at Night

In the early phases of the war, General David Petraeus enigmatically asked all comers, "Tell me how this will end?"

Ranger answers, "with a sad song." The end game could actually be sung by composers in all genres: George Jones ("He Stopped Loving Her Today"); The Smiths ("I Know It's Over"); Roy Orbison ("Cryin'"); Edvard Grieg's "Hearts Wounds" and anything from the perennially sad Chris Isaaks.

These wars will produce a veritable symphony of sorrows, but we prognosticate not a commensurate cavalcade of happy tunes.