RANGER AGAINST WAR: Jumpin' Jack Flash <

Friday, November 23, 2007

Jumpin' Jack Flash

Mohammad Al-Rayies, (The Arab News, Saudi Arabia)

I was schooled with a strap right across my back,

But its all right now, in fact, its a gas!

--Jumping Jack Flash
, Rolling Stones

Gripweed:
And I'm not a thief, really.
I've never found anything worth keeping.

--How I Won the War
(1967)
__________

Ranger is often asked what he would do to "win" in Iraq. This hearkens him back to 1968.


While attending Infantry Officer Basic Course at Ft. Benning, Georgia, Ranger had a Company Tactical Officer name of Charles Willoughby, Cpt., Infantry.


Cpt. Willoughby was a Silver Star recipient from the Battle of Lang Vei. Without a doubt, Willoughby was a combat-hardened Special Forces veteran of COIN, and as such, his opinion should be considered relevant and pertinent. In fact, it is as valid today as it was in 1968.

One morning during PT, several of us young, dumb and full of cum freshly minted 2nd lieutenants were hung over from the previous night's drunkenness. This was a frequent occurrence. Well anyway, we were doggin' it, merely going through the motions, when Cpt. Willoughby's wisdom was bestowed.


During jumping jacks, Willoughby pulled yours truly out of the formation and chewed me out from head to toe. The core message was, this type of behavior (=laziness in PT) was the reason the U.S. was losing in Vietnam. As noted, if anybody knew we were losing, it would be a guy like Willoughby.

So that is the long and short of it. We were losing because lazy 2nd LT's were not doing their PT ministrations with vigor. It did not matter that the war was unwinnable. It all boiled down to lax side-straddle hops, jumping jacks and push ups.

Using the Willoughby formula, add more repetitions to the jumping jacks and the war is as good as won.

(Note: Willoughby retired a Major, and passed on a few years ago. Requiescat in pace.)

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8 Comments:

Blogger Lurch said...

CPT Willoughny was right. I often opined that if only more green-eared butterbars had jumped up and down and flapped their wings we'd have been much better off.

Friday, November 23, 2007 at 10:57:00 PM GMT-5  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ha ! Good one lurch. That made my day. Glad to see that the officer corp had to endure a few of the shall we say inconvieniences that the Enlisted Men had too endure. Hell, when I got out of basis I thought pushups were the cure for everything from insubordination to the clapp!

Friday, November 23, 2007 at 11:41:00 PM GMT-5  
Blogger Lurch said...

Naw, you're wrong, TW. You get the clap while doing pushups.

Saturday, November 24, 2007 at 10:48:00 AM GMT-5  
Blogger rangeragainstwar said...

lurch and tw,

I'm glad that the clap was a disease of the privates. It was the only benefit of being an officer.

Lurch, I agree there is nothing as dangerous as a 2 LT with a map and a rifle. Fortunately we had good NCO's to provide guidance and assistance.

Saturday, November 24, 2007 at 11:02:00 AM GMT-5  
Blogger The Minstrel Boy said...

train hard. fight easy.

master chief boatswain's mate norr

who also once told me from the main deck while i was manning the hand pumps below

when the water passes your knees lad, follow the rats.

Saturday, November 24, 2007 at 11:19:00 AM GMT-5  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

MB,

I love that bit of advice.

So, should we extrapolate that bit of wisdom to current times?

Saturday, November 24, 2007 at 4:15:00 PM GMT-5  
Blogger The Minstrel Boy said...

master chief norr was a legend. he trained two generations of UDT/SEALS and was prone to saying, on the first day of training, if you lads never meet an enemy that scares you more than i do i will consider my training a success.

his training was a success with me. i never faced an opponent that was as frightening as the master chief.

i've heard him say the old nautical proverb about the rats many times when somebody else leaves their white house gig "to spend more time with my family."

Saturday, November 24, 2007 at 9:28:00 PM GMT-5  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

MB,

Your Master Chief Norr sounds frightening, but legendary.

The rats know best how to navigate murky waters (like Mu(r)kasey [?]), so good advice during precipitous times, if one wants to save one's neck.

Saturday, November 24, 2007 at 9:37:00 PM GMT-5  

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