RANGER AGAINST WAR: The Case of the Red-Headed League <

Saturday, January 15, 2011

The Case of the Red-Headed League

There's a lotta things about me
you don't know anything about, Dottie.

Things you wouldn't understand.

Things you couldn't understand.

Things you shouldn't understand.

--Pee-Wee's Big Adventure

Officials say that they have photos of Jared L. Loughner posing with a Glock semiautomatic pistol while wearing a red G-string (New Insights into Jared Loughner).

"In some of the photos Mr. Loughner is holding the gun near his crotch, and in others, presumably taken in a mirror, he is holding the gun next to his buttocks, investigators said. It was not clear when the photos were taken."

As if the clarinet playing were not convincing enough of Mr. Loughner's rightness, we now have the Col. Russel Williams indictment, i.e., the panty fetish. The kink suggests he was indubitably messed up, the confusion of where to place the gun, an indicator of his confused sexuality -- a double damnation.

Can a person with such a gun-and-panty fetish be expected to be a good citizen, in the South 48?

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Blogger Underground Carpenter said...

Hi Jim and Lisa,

Lisa, I would never have suspected you were a Pee Wee Herman fan. Big Adventure is one of my favorite movies, but Mrs. UC leaves the room if I turn it on.


Sunday, January 16, 2011 at 4:38:00 PM GMT-5  
Blogger Lisa said...

Hi Dave,

How can one NOT be a Pee-Wee fan? (My eclecticism knows no bounds, though I think ranger's might.)

Mr. Reubens recently commented on how he shall never escape the pervert tag earned after his unfortunate film house experience, and that is my point:

Why does the media hawk these incidentals to amuse the masses when they are just salacious tidbits which probably describe more people than we know. So ... what does it mean that Loughner wears red undies and poses with a gun, or that he plays the clarinet, and why do we care?

Monday, January 17, 2011 at 1:13:00 PM GMT-5  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think it means that Loughner is somewhat sexually boring and lacking in fashion sense and therefore underserving of even an iota of sympathy. For example, I would think that the undies should have been something in black leather, maybe with rhinestones or metalic studs; slung low over the hips. Or perhaps, something pink and lacey. You know, the whole nice, but oh so naughty thing. More exotic still, bring out the primitive hunter persona with an animal skin patterned loin cloth.....and why no accessories, like matching gloves (what kind of assassin goes out on the town without gloves?) and magazine pouches?......


Monday, January 17, 2011 at 5:29:00 PM GMT-5  
Blogger Lisa said...

Exactly, Avedis! How mundane is the red g-string/gun/phallus nexus?

Now you, OTOH, are thinking. Gloves -- preferably up to the elbow -- would have been tres chic! And a holster rig with pouches ... that would have shown forethought.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011 at 1:26:00 PM GMT-5  
Blogger rangeragainstwar said...

Guns don't kill people-people in red underwear kill people.
Not good for victorias secret .

Tuesday, January 18, 2011 at 4:04:00 PM GMT-5  
Blogger FDChief said...

You can take away my crimson panties when you pry them from my cold, dead...backside?

Perhaps we need a constitutional amendment protecting the right to wear unusual scanties and not be mocked in the national press. OR MENTIONED in the national press, since they're obviously so busy exposing corporatism, warrantless imprisonment, the cost of the War on (Some People Who Use Some) Drugs, the usual malefactors of great wealth, military shenagains in central Asia...

Oh, wait...

Wednesday, January 19, 2011 at 1:03:00 AM GMT-5  
Blogger Lisa said...



It's so ridiculous, eh? We know there is some national neurosis at work, but we can't seem to pin the tail on the right donkey. So it goes ...

Down with crimson scanties, as we let out a nervous snicker.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011 at 1:17:00 PM GMT-5  

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