Spray and Pray

When you're alone and life is making you lonely
you can always go - downtown

When you've got worries, all the noise and the hurry
Seems to help, I know - downtown

Just listen to the music of the traffic in the city
Linger on the sidewalk where the neon signs are pretty
--Downtown, Petula Clark

Why don't they pass a Constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody
from learning anything? If it works as well as prohibition did,
in five years Americans would be the smartest race of people on earth
--Will Rogers


Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people
who are putting us on, or by imbeciles who really mean it?

--Mark Twain
_________

So now the U.S. military has been promoted to being the security forces for Baghdad:

''Security forces in Baghdad have full control in only 40 percent of the city five months into the pacification campaign, a top American general said Saturday as U.S. troops began an offensive against two al-Qaida strongholds on the capital's southern outskirts.''

''The overall commander in Iraq, Gen. David Petraeus, said during a news conference with visiting Defense Secretary Robert Gates that the operation would put troops into key al-Qaida-held areas surrounding Baghdad (U.S.: 60% of Baghdad Not Controlled).''

So troops will be put into key al Qaida areas surrounding Baghdad--then what?

''[Lt. Gen. Raymond] Odierno said there was a long way to go in retaking the city from Shiite Muslim militias, Sunni Arab insurgents and al-Qaida terrorists.''

Of course, when we wrest the city from the Shia militias, Sunni Arab insurgents and al Qaida terrorists, there won't be anybody left to inhabit these areas, as the forementioned people are Iraq. It is their country, after all.

Perhaps once we've swept all of the dead-enders out, we can use it as we do the bought Southwestern city of Playas [Zombie Beach Party].

The article further reports on the found i.d. cards for Spc. Alex R. Jimenez and Pvt. Byron Fouty, who ''were snatched in a raid. . .''

Snatched--sounds so much better, more amateur and below-board--than captured. It is like watching an episode from Get Smart, and we are dealing with little more than rank amateurs. Personally, Ranger hates it when he gets snatched.

''Two top advisers to the prime minister said al-Maliki, a Shiite, objected vigorously to the new U.S. policy of arming and training Sunni militants in the fight against al-Qaida.''

What's the problem? It is incredible that the Shia leadership does not understand that arming Sunni militants and ''former'' insurgents is actually a good thing. Truly, things just can't get any stranger than this incredible initiative. Hell, let's just give everybody an AK-47 and let them duke it out; may the best man win. Surely the NRA would approve.

''A third said Gates told al-Maliki that political and legislative action sought by the U.S., including a new law to share oil revenues among all Iraqis, must be complete by September when the defense secretary has to report to Congress on progress in Iraq.''

Now, this is democracy in action. What if the Shias do not want to share their oil revenue? Is GWB prepared to veto their legislation? It does work that way, doesn't it? Vetoes are pretty powerful things, especially in the hands of the Decider Guy.

''Gates also met with President Jalal Talabani, a Kurd, and expressed concern that the security situation nationwide might be spiraling out of control, a presidential aide said.''

At least Gates demonstrates some subtlety here, as a master of understatement. Might be--or, it might just be an example of a tight run ship. Hard to tell. Wouldn't be prudent at this juncture to come down on it one way or the other.

The article ends with a tidbit on the sort of rabble-rousing the hoodlums are about:

''On Saturday, attackers blew up the al-Ashrah al-Mubashra mosque in Basra at dawn, residents in nearby houses said. As they were leaving, the bombers wrote graffiti on the complex's outer wall with the names of revered Shiite saints. . .''

The fact that they had time to write graffiti indicates to Ranger that they were not exactly pressed for time. Possibly controlling the sale of spray paint will alleviate this phenomenon. Nothing else seems very effective.